The Answer Man

Dan M. from Dodge City Kansas asks, “Dear Answerman, I say climate change is fake, what do you think?”

Dear Dan, it’s obvious that you are a man who does his research and knows right from wrong, so let’s take a look at some of your other wise choices.

The home-made hot tub that overheated, boiled your testicles and rendered you infertile.

That tattoo that expresses your love for a band that wrote  “Something in Your Mouth.” (you’re so much cooler when you leave it in your mouth/’cuz you look so much cuter with something in your mouth.)  Nothing says “classy” like a song about blowjobs.

The time your friends said, “Hey who wants to stand on their head, put lightbulbs in their underwear, spread their legs and drop a wooden stepladder on their nut sack?” And you replied, “Pick me!”

Is climate change for real? It’s as real as the glass shards embedded in your taint.

Love.

Poppy

justaskpoppy@icloud.com