Tag Archives: workout

Bikini

BikiniClothesLine

Eunice K, from Arapahoe, Indiana asks, “Dear Mr. Answerman, when do I know it’s time to stop wearing a bikini?”

Dear Eunice, I’m no fan of “body shaming”, everyone should make their own call as to when it’s time to hang up the two piece. Having said that, I’ve created this simple three question test for my readers:

1) From a distance, does it look like your ass slipped around to where your crotch is?

2) Do guys with gang tattoos say your c-section scar is “muy caliente”?

3) Have you ever gone to Olive Garden, ordered their “Sausage Stuffed Giant Rigatoni” and had the waiter reply, “Oh snap! Shit just got real up in this bitch.”

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions it’s time to start thinking about a one piece and some Zumba classes.

 Love.

Poppy

justaskpoppy@icloud.com

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Marathon Man

Runner

Keith R. from Oak Ridge, Tennessee asks, “Dear Answerman, I run a lot of marathons, but the only way I can run fast times is to run behind a woman with a really tight ass and fantasize about her the whole way. Does that make me a pervert?”

Dear Keith, only if you cross the finish line and find out that the tight ass you’ve been chasing for 26 miles belongs to a 16 year old boy.

Love.

Poppy

justaskpoppy@icloud.com

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Workout

Ianthe M. from Topanga, California asks: Dear Poppy, “Can you do anything about women walking around in tight workout clothes?”

Ianthe, I could, but why? We all like to feel superior, and it’s much easier when you’ve got this trolling the Entenmann’s section at Wal Mart.

81393414

Love.

Poppy

justaskpoppy@icloud.com

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